{"id":11126,"date":"2018-12-21T06:00:36","date_gmt":"2018-12-21T12:00:36","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.confabulatorcafe.com\/?p=11126"},"modified":"2018-12-21T06:00:36","modified_gmt":"2018-12-21T12:00:36","slug":"help-my-elf","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.confabulatorcafe.com\/?p=11126","title":{"rendered":"Help My Elf"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Please, Please, Please Help My Elf<\/p>\n<p>This project is fully-funded.<\/p>\n<p>Amount requested: $100<\/p>\n<p>Amount raised: $1,225.18<\/p>\n<p>Backers: 1<\/p>\n<p>Hello and welcome to my Crowdfunder. My name is Bethany and I am asking for between a hundred and two hundred dollars to help my elf.<\/p>\n<p>Every year in December my elf, Mr. Sparkles, comes to my house all the way from the North Pole. Mom says that he comes to tell on me to Santa if I\u2019m naughty, but Mr. Sparkles is a naughty elf, himself. He poops chocolate kisses on our mantle piece every year and one time I found him hanging from our ceiling fan all wrapped up in Christmas ribbon! Ha! I\u2019ve tried to tell him that he needs to be nicer, but Mom yells at me if I talk to Mr. Sparkles too much. She says that I don\u2019t have time to play silly games.<\/p>\n<p>This year, Mr. Sparkles didn\u2019t show up at my house. Mom told me that he probably got into trouble at the North Pole and can\u2019t get here this year. She also told me that I shouldn\u2019t worry about it. And she told me that worrying about elves is silly. And she told me that he\u2019s probably just lost in a box somewhere upstairs, but I don\u2019t think that one is possible. He got stuck in a jar one year, but I\u2019ve never seen Mr. Sparkles in a box, ever. And she told me that if I wanted my damn elf so bad I should just go find him. So I\u2019m going to.<\/p>\n<p>I read a book once on polar explorers and I know that it requires a lot of funding, which Mom says means money. I already have the sled. My dog Scotty will come with me. I have a backpack and a good coat and I can make my own sandwiches to pack as long as they\u2019re peanut butter or cheese. I just need the funding for my journey.<\/p>\n<p>Risks: It will be very cold and I might miss my toys and friends.<\/p>\n<p>Deadline: December 21 so I have time to get to the North Pole and back before Christmas so I can open my presents on Christmas morning.<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p style=\"text-align: left\">\n<p style=\"text-align: left\">One comment:<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: left\">Nikolas<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: left\">Dearest Bethany. Mister Sparkles misses you. Head north. Watch for the reindeer. They\u2019re on their way for you. Merry Christmas.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Please, Please, Please Help My Elf This project is fully-funded. Amount requested: $100 Amount raised: $1,225.18 Backers: 1 Hello and welcome to my Crowdfunder. My name is Bethany and I am asking for between a hundred and two hundred dollars to help my elf. Every year in December my elf, Mr. Sparkles, comes to my [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":20,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[356,422],"class_list":["post-11126","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-fiction","tag-epistolary","tag-flash-fiction"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.confabulatorcafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11126","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.confabulatorcafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.confabulatorcafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.confabulatorcafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/20"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.confabulatorcafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=11126"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.confabulatorcafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11126\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.confabulatorcafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=11126"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.confabulatorcafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=11126"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.confabulatorcafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=11126"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}