No Warm Fuzzies from Writing Right Now

I have to be completely honest: I haven’t felt that great about my writing for a long time.  Part of the reason for that is because I haven’t written anything more than a blog post or flash fiction in a long time. While I love the fact that the Cafe keeps me writing, there’s not a whole lot to these posts, and sometimes I only feel relief that I’m finally caught up with my assignments than any pride in their creation. Some assignments, like this one, are difficult to respond to because I’m not doing any writing outside of this, certainly nothing I’ve felt good about.

But it hasn’t always been this way. I used to feel good about my writing. It used to be that just the act of writing was what felt good.

I also really liked when I read back over something and I found something that made me laugh out loud. Knowing that even if nobody else in the world thought that particular joke was funny, at least I was able to catch myself off guard and make myself laugh at something my subconscious mind came up with when in the writing zone.

I miss the writing zone.

My best writing came when I got lost in the zone and wrote without even thinking about where I was going. It might be my biggest strength as a writer, letting thoughts flow and let the flow take me to places I didn’t necessarily expect. Trusting my instincts, my subconscious mind, to craft artistic sentences while still expanding plot with good pacing and developing characters.

But I haven’t been able to do that for awhile. I haven’t been able to let go, and I haven’t trusted myself enough to get lost in the zone lately.

I’d give a lot to be able to feel good about my writing again. Just thinking about what I used to love about it, thinking about what used to make me feel good about it, might be enough to motivate me to try again. Maybe it’s time to let go and see where the writing zone takes me again.

Sara is a Kansas-grown author of the fantasy and horror persuasions. She is convinced that fantastical things are waiting for her just around the corner, and until she finds the right corner, she writes about those things instead.

2 Comments

  • Ryan Schumacher says:

    This may be counter-intuitive, but I think this may be a good sign. You are growing as a writer. It’s no longer enough just to put words down on paper; you know what you are capable of and expect more from yourself.

    • You might be on to something, Ryan. I know what level I am capable of writing at, and the fear of not meeting that standard I’ve set has been debilitating to my writing process. I need to just jump back into it and not care if it sucks, like old times. That seems to be when my best work emerges, anyway. When I don’t think about it too hard.

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